Thursday, May 19, 2016

Promises Kept Part Two

So now for Part Two,

Emotions would continue to run high for the rest of the day. Feeling that I had completed a major task in sending the package to our female friend, I now needed to focus on the story of another gamer. One, who sadly took his own life last Thursday, and what is even worse was that he was age ten.

Colin Fraley, wanted to be a video game designer, and apparently had been troubled from age five, or so what we are all being told. Yet, no one would have know, he was a boy who took it upon himself to engage my son and daughter in "hello" "how are you?" "hey guys". "So why is this a big deal?" you may ask. Well my son and daughter (as many of you know are 7 and 5) are very personable, with speaking to many people, and how we give lovies (hugs). I am blessed that my wife and I have raised two very compassionate children, and Colin wasn't one of the children who blew off their talk, their greetings, their hugs. No, he embraced it, and gave them conservation in return. He gave them...happiness in return.

Stephanie and I had discussed would we attend, who would attend, in terms of the funeral (which was yesterday). We decided that it would be too much for our children, and my wife would not be able to leave work at The Ohio State University. I am in the most flexible position of all of us, and decided since I have been no stranger to death (my time in Iraq, and personal experiences) that I would represent the Elliott Family.

My message in the card left spoke of how I made a promise to not only myself, but to my wife, and my therapist that I would try to become a better Father, Husband, Gamer, Human Being, and always try to remember what is most important about life. I found that by attending the funeral, and sharing with the father the story that I have shared with you here, that I honored what I set out to do.I spoke of the loss for the community that we would never know the games he would design, both board and video, and that the possibilities of what was lost could not be fully counted.

By sharing with him, and through the tears we all had yesterday, I found that I was focusing on being better, and spending more time loving, caring, holding, and gaming with those I care about. I realized that Colin had given me two gifts, focus and clarity. I left, sharing with my family the conversation that had taken place, and how the outpouring of the school, and that of the community was fully and beautifully present.

Please make and take time to be with loved ones, and do things with them, including gaming, because on any given Thursday, it can come to an abrupt and catastrophic end. On any given Wednesday, you could be attending a funeral of a child, thinking about what you as a human being would have done differently, had you been given the time back.

I hope this story goes with you as well, the story of my second promise kept.

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